1) Born in a swirl of amber leaves and the smell of rain, I’ve always been drawn to the windy months of autumn. As a young girl, my favorite pastime was sitting outside in the fallen leaves, collecting the prettiest ones I could find.
2) Board games and hot chocolate adorned my shelf of life. I did not need to dust that shelf.
3) Memories of a boy with red race car shoes race through my mind, along with a teacher who had a tongue piercing. At the age of five, I vowed to get one also.
4) On a sunny Friday, my mom came to pick me up. Little did I know that would be the last I saw of the boy with race car shoes and the teacher with a pierced tongue. Growing up is hard.
5) Elementary school years are a blur of secrets and smiles, laughter and joy. You could not find a happier girl.
6) And suddenly everything is just a haze.
7) And now constantly I must to remind myself to breathe, because otherwise the plastic bags I call lungs will slowly drift away and the pipes in my throat will start pushing out smoke rather than steam.
8) Rehearsed words pour out of chapped and faded lips and her smiles are so genuine but only if you say they are. She gets tired easy, and cries easy, and all the wrong things suddenly become easy and the only thing she knows how to do is say sorry. She’s so sorry.
9) She doesn’t notice as posters advertising mistakes are torn from her walls. She doesn’t see the frames filled with regret being pulled from their hooks. She only knows she must get out.
10) And all of a sudden, a light switch is found. Under the tacked up pieces of loneliness and anger, a light switch emerges from the wall.
11) And when the she flipped that switch, I suddenly became as bright as the sun.
The first English assignment of my freshman year was for us to write a poem about ourselves, and this is what I turned in. I wrote two other poems before this, but trashed both because I didn’t like them enough. Let me know what you think in the comments!